Feelings like this always are though ♪ Or they're the types of things you should take seriously, at least... Mm, no, I can't say that, when I still can't take it seriously either... And I guess we're young, so crushes are crushes, and eventually they'll pass.
[ ... ]
But it's important to be happy while you can!! You should say something, if you two aren't already mutually aware. If you and Mao have the same kind of relationship as Hinatan and I... You know, that was kind of the tipping point for me, since we established how I feel about my best friend...~? As unfortunate as that is.
Mmmm... I'd say you're right if it was anyone else, but I'm terrified of anything changing between us Or damaging our friendship So I'm just going to let it pass It's for the best.
I've never confessed to a single person I've ever liked because I'm too scared it'll mess things up, Izumi. It'll always be that way, too. I can't bear the thought of being rejected, so I'd want to know my feelings are returned first. Ahh, maybe they are returned, but now...
[ there's ellipses, tsukasa typing and typing and...
for someone who was typing for so long, the next message is short; he deleted it all, honestly. ]
I still can't do it. ♪ I'm not so bold and brave... We're the same, you and I.
Ahaha... we're even more alike than I thought. It's okay. You don't have to say it... I think I understand Because I'm the same as you
It's times like this when I wish I could talk to Miyamura How did he deal with liking someone? Was he the first one to confess? What was going through his head when he was sorting out his feelings? Did he try to deny it like I did, or face it head-on?
[Don't think he didn't notice that pause. It's.... difficult, truthfully, to say even this much. But if anyone will understand, it's Tsukasa.]
...You can talk to me about it, you know Anything you want. Even if I can't help in any way other than listen, I can at least promise you that.
[ so many people offer him that, but it's like he said.
no one in that chat talks about anything.
(especially not from his unit. he's aware he is part of the problem, though. ]
You too. Though it's just Um, even if it's returned, I can't, because... He was really upset when I left in February. I don't think I've ever had a tighter hug in my life...? And I was really upset when people nnot on Retrospec disappeared... It's too risky to confess, go out, and things like that. To me, for me, at least. That's all.
So it comes down to Retrospec in the end... It isn't melodramatic when it's just part of how our lives are.
It's different for me, since he's my family, but I understand that too. Not knowing when someone's going to lose access Or how long things are going to stay the same
...When was the last time you checked your contact list?
Ahh, that makes him the only mod in sena's chat, right...? Everyone please behave...
probably not what he should think about, but it's the first thing he latches onto so he doesn't just. something. ]
You too. I'm sorry. I'm really, really... Do you
[ ...mm. ]
Do you want to hang out tonight? Technically, I should be getting things ready for Obon this year, but that isn't for another few weeks anyway... Future Tsukasa can worry about it.
No way, if I'm hanging out with a friend, we're going to do something fun... I have sparklers if you want to burn them at the beach? It isn't quite "setting off fireworks", but I think it'll do in a pinch. Or we could go to that new amusement park that opened up... or rather, appeared recently... (Do you ever get worried your school is going to just appear in the city one day, because I'm sort of worried Yumenosaki will.)
I won't say no to sparklers Are you sure it's okay? I feel pretty selfish making you hang out with me on such short notice But I'm also really happy you're free
Katagiri is a totally normal school, even if some of the people in it are weird But if Yumenosaki showed up, there might be problems...
I'm the one offering, aren't I~? It's my own selfishness. Besides, I understand the feeling... Meet you there? We can keep texting in the meantime, if you want.
Uwah, Katagiri's a nice name ☆ but ahaha, probably... maybe... I wonder if it comes with students.
Well, if you're willing to shoulder the blame, then... Just kidding. Thanks, Tsukasa Okay, I'll head that way now
I really doubt it, but it would be fun to meet them The people in my memories all seem really great (But also weird. But we're all weird.) I wish I could introduce you to them What about Yumenosaki? I've only really heard about Anzu And I know some of the unit names
[ there isn't much he can do for izumi, after all, but this...
this he can do. ]
Yumenosaki is really, really big... And has a lot of unique personalities, but I feel like that's normal given it's a... I think it's a performing arts school. The idol course seems to be the biggest draw though. Mm, what else... We participate in these concerts (Lives) called "Dream Festivals" or just "DreamFes" for short. They have different rankings too! B1s are unofficial DreamFes, so you don't need anyone's permission for them, but they also don't count towards your grades... (Because of course your perfomance and participation in your unit counts towards that if you're in this course.) Everything further up than that (A1, S1, S2, though A1s are for newbie idols) needs student council permission. Umm, but that's all kind of boring, let's see... Other units I know are... 2wink (Hinata told me, it's him and the twin brother he has in that life, Yuta-kun), Ra*bits (Hajime-kun and Nazuna are in this one? But Nazuna has memories of a different unit so, hmm...), Trickstar (Mao, Makoto, and two others... Subaru-kun is a name I heard), Switch (Sora, according to Hinata, and two other people), Valkyrie (this is the one Nazuna remembers, with a really eccentric Shu)... Knights Killers was a temporary unit made for that Judgment I mentioned in chat--we have all the members of that here, actually. Umm, there's fine too (said like the Italian word for end, fee-nay) and Undead and Ryuseitai... Fushimi-senpai is in fine...
Ugh, there's so many people. I sort of figured that, given how many people I already know that have memoriesof that school, but stiiiiill.
Sorry, I'm listening I was just getting my shoes on and heading out
I wasn't expecting you to give me so many details! But if it's a performing arts school, maybe it makes sense that there are so many eccentric people I know about Trickstar and 2wink, but it's still weird to think about Hinata having a twin Can you imagine trying to deal with two of him? Even one is a lot to handle sometimes (I say that with nothing but love)
I don't recognize all of those names, but it definitely sounds complicated There really were tons of people... and they were all idols, too If you ever get any music back, you have to show me right away
Ummmm, I wish I had more to tell you about Katagiri in return, but everything I've remembered is pretty normal At least so far. But I can tell you about the people there if you want?
No, same here ♪ I think you'll probably get there first unless I run... Please don't make fun of me if I'm a little out of breath.
Ahaha, I think two Hinatas sounds... like a lot of trouble, yeah, but the kind I could get behind. His brother was in Suou's class though, and he seemed pretty chill though, so I wonder if it really would be like having two of them... Them being twins, though, I'm sure there were a lot of similarities. Faces aside.
And of course ♪ You'll be the first person I send anything to, just for that. I'm sort of nervous getting anything by Knights, since I don't think I'd like listening to my voice that much (even one that's more, uhh, musically trained, let's say?), but... It's fine.
I'd love to hear about your peers!! There's Hori-san, obviously... Were you lucky enough to have friends along with having a girlfriend, Izutan? (Amazing~.)
Don't worry, I'm way more out of shape than you You don't need to run, even if I get there first!
Hinata and chill don't go together, so does that mean his twin was really different? It's weird to think about someone who looks like Hinata but doesn't act like him
Thanks, Tsukasa ♪ I'm sure you'll sound great! And you'll be singing with other people too, right? So you can focus on their voices instead!
Miyamura didn't really have friends until he met Hori-san, but amazingly, he has a whole circle of them in most of my memories Well... for the most part, anyway There was one guy named Shindou that befriended him in middle school like Mao did for me But I think he went to a different high school, since Miyamura had to start over before meeting Hori-san
Let's see... Ishikawa-kun is his other close friend, even though I don't know much about him There's also a friendly girl named Yuki, Sengoku who's the student council president (he's really skinny and would rather die than go swimming), a girl with pigtails, and a couple of others
Miyamura was quiet and a lot like me when his hair was long, but after he cut it, he seemed to get a lot more cheerful and friendly This might sound weird, but I'm kind of proud of him for making so many friends and learning how to be happy But yeah, I have sketches of everyone in my current sketchbook, so remind me to show you sometime!
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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It's Mao, right?
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But yeah
It is
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Not easy, is it.
Do you know if he likes you back, at least?
1/2
It's not relallutytwt
Ugh
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I can't lie to you.
It's not that serious or anything
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Or they're the types of things you should take seriously, at least...
Mm, no, I can't say that, when I still can't take it seriously either...
And I guess we're young, so crushes are crushes, and eventually they'll pass.
[ ... ]
But it's important to be happy while you can!!
You should say something, if you two aren't already mutually aware. If you and Mao have the same kind of relationship as Hinatan and I...
You know, that was kind of the tipping point for me, since we established how I feel about my best friend...~?
As unfortunate as that is.
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I'm terrified of anything changing between us
Or damaging our friendship
So I'm just going to let it pass
It's for the best.
Have you told him?
Hinata, I mean
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That's why I asked in the first place
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I've never confessed to a single person I've ever liked because I'm too scared it'll mess things up, Izumi.
It'll always be that way, too.
I can't bear the thought of being rejected, so I'd want to know my feelings are returned first.
Ahh, maybe they are returned, but now...
[ there's ellipses, tsukasa typing and typing and...
for someone who was typing for so long, the next message is short; he deleted it all, honestly. ]
I still can't do it. ♪
I'm not so bold and brave...
We're the same, you and I.
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It's okay. You don't have to say it... I think I understand
Because I'm the same as you
It's times like this when I wish I could talk to Miyamura
How did he deal with liking someone? Was he the first one to confess? What was going through his head when he was sorting out his feelings? Did he try to deny it like I did, or face it head-on?
[Don't think he didn't notice that pause. It's.... difficult, truthfully, to say even this much. But if anyone will understand, it's Tsukasa.]
...You can talk to me about it, you know
Anything you want.
Even if I can't help in any way other than listen, I can at least promise you that.
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no one in that chat talks about anything.
(especially not from his unit. he's aware he is part of the problem, though. ]
You too.
Though it's just
Um, even if it's returned, I can't, because...
He was really upset when I left in February. I don't think I've ever had a tighter hug in my life...?
And I was really upset when people nnot on Retrospec disappeared...
It's too risky to confess, go out, and things like that.
To me, for me, at least.
That's all.
Ahh, reading it makes me sound so melodramatic.
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It isn't melodramatic when it's just part of how our lives are.
It's different for me, since he's my family, but
I understand that too.
Not knowing when someone's going to lose access
Or how long things are going to stay the same
...When was the last time you checked your contact list?
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[ it doesn't settle well in his stomach and he fidgets, unseen, before he replies. ]
A little while ago, I guess...
A little more than a week ago? To check... something about Sena-senpai.
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But we have one more thing in common now.
...I'm glad you're still here
I don't know what I'd do if you lost access too
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oh.
Ahh, that makes him the only mod in sena's chat, right...? Everyone please behave...
probably not what he should think about, but it's the first thing he latches onto so he doesn't just. something. ]
You too.
I'm sorry. I'm really, really...
Do you
[ ...mm. ]
Do you want to hang out tonight?
Technically, I should be getting things ready for Obon this year, but that isn't for another few weeks anyway...
Future Tsukasa can worry about it.
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It'll just take some getting used to
I'll be fine, and he'll be fine too
But if you're okay with it, I might take you up on that offer
We can even work on Obon planning and stuff if you want to
[He just doesn't want to be completely alone.... But it's far more difficult to admit that out loud.]
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I have sparklers if you want to burn them at the beach?
It isn't quite "setting off fireworks", but I think it'll do in a pinch.
Or we could go to that new amusement park that opened up... or rather, appeared recently...
(Do you ever get worried your school is going to just appear in the city one day, because I'm sort of worried Yumenosaki will.)
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Are you sure it's okay?
I feel pretty selfish making you hang out with me on such short notice
But I'm also really happy you're free
Katagiri is a totally normal school, even if some of the people in it are weird
But if Yumenosaki showed up, there might be problems...
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It's my own selfishness.
Besides, I understand the feeling...
Meet you there? We can keep texting in the meantime, if you want.
Uwah, Katagiri's a nice name ☆ but ahaha, probably... maybe...
I wonder if it comes with students.
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Just kidding. Thanks, Tsukasa
Okay, I'll head that way now
I really doubt it, but it would be fun to meet them
The people in my memories all seem really great (But also weird. But we're all weird.)
I wish I could introduce you to them
What about Yumenosaki? I've only really heard about Anzu
And I know some of the unit names
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this he can do. ]
Yumenosaki is really, really big...
And has a lot of unique personalities, but I feel like that's normal given it's a...
I think it's a performing arts school.
The idol course seems to be the biggest draw though.
Mm, what else... We participate in these concerts (Lives) called "Dream Festivals" or just "DreamFes" for short.
They have different rankings too!
B1s are unofficial DreamFes, so you don't need anyone's permission for them, but they also don't count towards your grades...
(Because of course your perfomance and participation in your unit counts towards that if you're in this course.)
Everything further up than that (A1, S1, S2, though A1s are for newbie idols) needs student council permission.
Umm, but that's all kind of boring, let's see...
Other units I know are... 2wink (Hinata told me, it's him and the twin brother he has in that life, Yuta-kun), Ra*bits (Hajime-kun and Nazuna are in this one? But Nazuna has memories of a different unit so, hmm...), Trickstar (Mao, Makoto, and two others... Subaru-kun is a name I heard), Switch (Sora, according to Hinata, and two other people), Valkyrie (this is the one Nazuna remembers, with a really eccentric Shu)...
Knights Killers was a temporary unit made for that Judgment I mentioned in chat--we have all the members of that here, actually.
Umm, there's fine too (said like the Italian word for end, fee-nay) and Undead and Ryuseitai... Fushimi-senpai is in fine...
Ugh, there's so many people.
I sort of figured that, given how many people I already know that have memoriesof that school, but stiiiiill.
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I was just getting my shoes on and heading out
I wasn't expecting you to give me so many details!
But if it's a performing arts school, maybe it makes sense that there are so many eccentric people
I know about Trickstar and 2wink, but it's still weird to think about Hinata having a twin
Can you imagine trying to deal with two of him?
Even one is a lot to handle sometimes
(I say that with nothing but love)
I don't recognize all of those names, but it definitely sounds complicated
There really were tons of people... and they were all idols, too
If you ever get any music back, you have to show me right away
Ummmm, I wish I had more to tell you about Katagiri in return, but everything I've remembered is pretty normal
At least so far. But I can tell you about the people there if you want?
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Please don't make fun of me if I'm a little out of breath.
Ahaha, I think two Hinatas sounds... like a lot of trouble, yeah, but the kind I could get behind.
His brother was in Suou's class though, and he seemed pretty chill though, so I wonder if it really would be like having two of them...
Them being twins, though, I'm sure there were a lot of similarities. Faces aside.
And of course ♪ You'll be the first person I send anything to, just for that.
I'm sort of nervous getting anything by Knights, since I don't think I'd like listening to my voice that much (even one that's more, uhh, musically trained, let's say?), but... It's fine.
I'd love to hear about your peers!! There's Hori-san, obviously...
Were you lucky enough to have friends along with having a girlfriend, Izutan? (Amazing~.)
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You don't need to run, even if I get there first!
Hinata and chill don't go together, so does that mean his twin was really different?
It's weird to think about someone who looks like Hinata but doesn't act like him
Thanks, Tsukasa ♪ I'm sure you'll sound great!
And you'll be singing with other people too, right?
So you can focus on their voices instead!
Miyamura didn't really have friends until he met Hori-san, but amazingly, he has a whole circle of them in most of my memories
Well... for the most part, anyway
There was one guy named Shindou that befriended him in middle school like Mao did for me
But I think he went to a different high school, since Miyamura had to start over before meeting Hori-san
Let's see... Ishikawa-kun is his other close friend, even though I don't know much about him
There's also a friendly girl named Yuki, Sengoku who's the student council president (he's really skinny and would rather die than go swimming), a girl with pigtails, and a couple of others
Miyamura was quiet and a lot like me when his hair was long, but after he cut it, he seemed to get a lot more cheerful and friendly
This might sound weird, but I'm kind of proud of him for making so many friends and learning how to be happy
But yeah, I have sketches of everyone in my current sketchbook, so remind me to show you sometime!
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